I Need to Turn Off My Brain
I've got a serious problem that shows up in many areas of my life.
I frequently can't focus on things.
Even though time shows that the things I do stick with are highly rewarding.
In 1997, I picked up a guitar and learned how to play. I'd do that most weeks for the next six years to the point where I can sing and strum to anything.
In 2012 or so, I committed to going to the gym just about every day. I did that for about five years and it changed my build forever, and helped me hit a personal record I've never been able to beat since.
Somewhere in 2014 or so, I decided to push myself and create one ukulele cover a week for a year. I actually did it and it brought me out of my shell quite a lot.
But for the life of me, I can't do anything I set my mind to.
This is usually called discipline, which I previously thought was just sheer will power. But recently I've begun to think of it in a slightly different way. Every time I go to do something I know I should do, there's a small voice that comes up with something else. Tim Urban of Wait But Why calls it the Instant Gratification Monkey and his take on procrastination is a great one.
But for people like me, who live in their heads so much, I'm wondering if it's better to just turn off my brain. Before I can rationalise doing something later, or formulate some great excuse, I just do the thing without thinking about it. I can't exactly whine about it if my brain is off, right?
That's kind of what happened with my other habits. Guitar? I just ended up picking up the guitar all the time. Brought it with me to most places I went. Never really questioned it. Just did it. It sounds like discipline on the surface, but it's just sheer braindead convenience.
Going to the gym? Because I often did it when I should have been physically at my desk at work. Do you really need a reason to make playing hooky at work exciting? I just didn't want to work.
I honestly have no idea why I did the ukulele thing. So I kind of consider that one a miracle.
There's apparently things you can do to help turn off your brain, although they aren't really marketed like that. I think it's in Atomic Habits that you chain behaviours to pre-existing ones. Like you regularly get up and brush your teeth, so right after that you do the next habit.
It's basically behavioural conditioning. Yeah, that behavioural conditioning. The same kind where you train a dog like my Maple to do something, usually bribed with chicken, so often that it becomes the default braindead behaviour, and even without chicken.
So not only do I need to turn off my brain, but I apparently need to be more like a dog.
Anyway, I'm trying it. Especially for my Japanese study. It'll probably work. Possibly not. In any case it's worth a shot.
Woof.